Sunday, March 1, 2009

Essay #2

What would you do if you and your friend applied to the same college and only he got accepted, even though you have higher grades? And it just happens to be that your friend’s father or mother went to that college. Come to find out that he eventually ends up dropping out. You would be mad wouldn’t you? Well this is called legacy admissions. This topic has been very controversial over the past few years.
In “The dirty little secrets of college admissions” Roberto Rodriguez states that legacies are taking money from the people who actually need it. Rodriguez says that these people are Blacks and Latinos. The way that he justifies this is because the legacies are getting scholarships that could be more useful to the poor. It says that the poor are being “squeezed” out of college because they have no way to pay for it.
Also in the Rodriguez’s article it states that “special admits” have always been a staple of private universities and colleges. And in “When Legacies are a college’s lifeblood” Elizabeth F. Farrell mentions some schools that use legacy admissions, and most of them are private universities. Farrell also has some data that says at Calvin College of the four thousand one hundred and ninety students admitted; forty percent of them were legacies. And of the ninety-four percent that were excepted ninety-six percent of those were legacies.
Some people think that legacies are a good thing, but there are also people who believe that they are very harmful to kids too. It is can be a big part of college admissions too. I believe that it will end up being that students will have to know someone that went to the college that they want to go to in order to get in. I also believe that this will just make kids feel like they will always be handed things in life.

1 comment:

  1. A rough draft should be your best effort. Where is the title page? Works Cited list?

    What would you do
     How would you feel
    if you and your friend applied to the same college and only he got accepted, even though you have
    [Vt: present conditional] had
    higher grades? And it just happens to be that
    [Don’t begin sentence with conjunction.]
    What if it just happened that
    your friend’s father or mother went to that college.
    [Pu] ?
    Come to find out that
    [Di: substandard] What if
    he eventually ends up dropping out.
    [Wo, Re] he ended up dropping out?
    You would be mad wouldn’t
    [Di] You would be furious // outraged // disappointed // indignant
    [Pu, Cn] mad, wouldn’t
    you? Well this
    [Pu, Cn] Well, this
    [Pp: this =?]
    is called legacy admissions. This
    [Ec]
    topic has been very controversial over the past few years.
    In “The dirty little secrets of college admissions”
    [Pu, Uc]
    Roberto Rodriguez states that legacies are taking money
    [explain]
    from the people who actually need it. Rodriguez says that these people
     [Ga, Rp]
    are Blacks and Latinos. The way that he justifies this
     [Pp: this =?]
    is because
    [Ga, Rp]
    the legacies are getting scholarships that could be more useful to the poor.
    [Who said anything about money? My understanding was that the policy had to do with admissions, not scholarships.]
    It says
    [Ga What says?]
    that the poor are being “squeezed”
    [Pu – unnecessary quotation marks]
    out of college because they have no way to pay for it.
    Also in the Rodriguez’s article it
    Rodriguez also
    states that “special admits” have always been a staple of private universities and colleges.
    [What’s the point, here? Shouldn’t this be in your introduction?]
    And
    [Don’t begin sentence with conjunction.]
    in “When Legacies are a college’s lifeblood”
    [Uc] College’s Lifeblood”
    [Cn] Lifeblood,”
    Elizabeth F. Farrell mentions some schools that use legacy admissions, and most of them are private universities. Farrell also has some data that says
    data indicating that
    at Calvin College of
    [Cn] College, of
    the four thousand one hundred and ninety students admitted; forty
    [Cn] admitted, forty
    percent of them were
    [when?]
    [Re “of them”] forty percent were
    legacies. And of the ninety-four percent that were excepted
    [Sp; Cn] accepted,
    ninety-six percent of those
    [Re “of those”] were legacies.
    Some people think that legacies are a good thing, but there are also people who believe that they are very
    [De “very”]
    harmful to kids
    [Di]
    [Cn]
    too. It is can be
    [Ga, Pr]
    a big part
    [Di]
    of college admissions too.
    [Ec; Cn]
    I believe that it will end up being that
    [Di, Ga] there will come a time when
    students will have to know someone that went to the college that they want to go to in order to get in.
    [Wo]
    I also believe that this
    [Pp this =?]
    will just make kids feel like they will always be handed things in life.
    [Di; Wo]

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