The issue of same-sex versus mixed-sex schooling is a topic that is on the minds of few people. Some people believe that it is beneficial to both sexes that they are though in an environment that will not only get an education but also learn how to act in social settings. And on the other hand some people believe that this will just hinder their education. They believe that if they don’t have the distraction of the opposite sex in their classrooms then they will learn and remember things more effectively.
In “Single-sex schooling: Is it simply a ‘class act’,” the authors, Georgina Tsolidis and Ian R. Dobson, stated that if there were more same-sex schools for boys then they would have a higher intelligence. It also states that same-sex schooling has been very productive with girls. In the article “Parents views on mixed and single-sex secondary schools,” by Anne West and Jan Hunter, it states that some parents would have a positive reaction to a same-sex school.
Some of the areas that they agreed on were that the girls that have participated in same-sex schooling have had better test results. They also see same-sex schooling as a way for boys to be more concentrated on their school work instead of the girls. Also both articles believe that if there were more all boy schools then it would be more beneficial.
Although they agreed on some points, they didn’t agree on all. They disagree with same-sex schools because of the underfunding that the same-sex schools have. They say that it would be better to just stay in mixed schools. Some of the parents in the second article feel that a mixed school would make the girls feel like they couldn’t do as much as the boys.
In conclusion, I believe that it would be very important for people to choose whether they wanted to send their child to a mixed or same-sex school. The only problem is that there aren’t many same-sex schools around. Finally you also have to pay tuition for a same-sex school, so that is a very big decision for people.
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Essay #1 Rough draft
ReplyDeleteThe issue of same-sex versus mixed-sex schooling is a topic that is on the minds of few people.
-->[So why make this statement?]
Some people believe that it
-->[it=?]
is beneficial to both sexes that they are though
-->[Garbled. Rephrase.]
in an environment that
-->in an environment where
will
-->they will
not only get an education but also learn how to
act in social settings. And on the other hand some people believe that this will just hinder their education. They believe
that if they
-->["They" salad.]
don’t have the distraction of the opposite sex in their classrooms then they
-->classrooms, they
will learn and remember things more
effectively.
In “Single-sex schooling: Is it simply a ‘class act’,” the authors, Georgina Tsolidis and Ian R. Dobson, stated
-->state
that if there
were more same-sex schools for boys then they would have a higher intelligence.
-->["They" = schools?]
It also states that same-sex schooling has
been very productive with girls. In the article “Parents views on mixed and single-sex secondary schools,” by Anne West and
Jan Hunter, it states
-->...Schools," Anne West and Jan Hunter claim
that some parents would have
-->[If what?]
a positive reaction to a same-sex school.
Some of the areas that they
-->[They=?]
agreed on were that the girls that have participated in same-sex schooling have had better test
results. They also see same-sex schooling as a way for boys to be more concentrated on their school work
-->to concentrate more on
instead of the
girls.
--> on girls.
Also both articles believe that
-->Both articles concur that
if there were more all boy schools then it would be more beneficial.
-->all-boy
-->it would be good if there were more all-boy schools.
Although they agreed on some points, they didn’t agree on all.
-->there were some areas of disagreement.
They
-->[They =??]
disagree with
-->oppose
same-sex schools because of the
underfunding that the same-sex schools have.
-->because same-sex schools are underfunded. [Non-sequitur]
They say that it would be better to just stay
-->[Who should stay? They?]
in mixed schools. Some of the
parents in the second article
-->parents quoted in
feel that a mixed school would make the girls feel like they couldn’t do as much as the boys.
-->they were inferior to boys.
In conclusion, I believe that it would be very important for people to choose whether they wanted to send their child to a
mixed or same-sex school.
-->[What does that mean? Are you saying it is important for the government to offer a choice?]
The only problem is that there aren’t many same-sex schools around. Finally you also have to pay
-->Finally,
tuition for a same-sex school, so that is a very big decision for people.
-->[Your concluding sentence changes the entire argument. Why didn't you mention the public/private dichotomy earlier?]